17w0d

I realized today I have not written in here for such a long time!  Really it's just because my doctor's appointments have slowed down to every 4 weeks and ultrasounds have REALLY slowed down, so there is not much to report, which I guess is great news!

I went yesterday for my 16 week check-up at the doctor.  I have been SO worried about baby every day not having as many ultrasounds that something may be wrong.  I used to think that if something went wrong, I would know about it, but I have heard more and more, especially later into the pregnancy, that if something goes wrong, sometimes you don't know, baby will just stop growing.  Well, that is all I needed to make me start worrying all of the time!  I am still not showing much, just a tiny baby bump.  I see it on myself, but I still don't think anyone else would say "oh, she's pregnant", they would just think I have a pooch (which trust me, I do even when not preggers).  So that makes me worried because my sister in law who is just as far along as me is showing much more.  It is her second child which I hear you show so much earlier, but it still gives me something else to worry about that something is awry.  So yesterday at the appointment I tried to hint at how worried I'd be and how an ultrasound would make me feel better.  Instead they told me they were going to listen to the baby's heartbeat with a tiny wand on my belly, like a mini-ultrasound wand which should give me all the reassurance I need.  The baby was there, pretty low down, heartbeat was 147.  I was so relieved to hear it, especially since it took a minute to find it, she kept picking up my heartbeat, but still not as good as seeing baby wiggling away on the monitor.  I asked Brian if possibly that 147 was my heartbeat since I'm sure my heart was pounding waiting for her to find the baby, he just laughed and told me if my heartbeat was 147 I'd be dead.  Nice, honey :)  Then they felt my stomach to do a "rough" measurement of how large my uterus was.  She said it was showing a little big, which wasn't a bad thing at this stage in pregnancy.  That also worried me that maybe I had too much amniotic fluid, but I guess that only happens later in pregnancy.  SO bottom line is, baby is doing well, so they say, and I should relax, but I have come to realize I am going to just be a nervous wreck through this whole pregnancy.  I think I will really enjoy once I can start feeling baby move, but I can see myself already getting worried if I don't feel it often enough, the worrying never ends :) 

I find out the baby's sex on January 23 along with a thorough ultrasound.  I'm very excited to see baby on the ultrasound, of course, and they said we could bring a blank DVD and they would record it, which will be neat.  I'm also ready to find out what sex the baby is, mostly because I hate calling baby an "it", ready to say "he" or "she" and start picking a name.  I'm also excited to start showing more, which my doctor says usually happens between 20-24 weeks. 

I have found I'm very intolerant to sad stories on the news.  I get too emotional and start crying, so usually I change the channel before they get into them.  Seems lots of people are getting shot lately, leaving behind children, etc.  You start to realize what a scary place the world is when you're getting ready to bring another life into it.

I have a work trip to Indianapolis the week before my ultrasound.  I'm ready for that trip to be over.  I'm a little more nervous traveling being pregnant that something could go wrong and I'd be all alone, and I'm not a fan of flying either.  It's only for 3 days, 2 night, so hopefully it will go fast. 

Next time I write hopefully I'll be able to give great news from the 20 week ultrasound check!!